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Jewgasmic Blog on the Mikva
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12 Step Program inspired by Nidda/Mikva to "spice" your marriage. Idea #1

Inspired by the Mikva episode by In Over Our Heads

The twelve days (the average apparently for many people, though Sefardim can make it as little as 10 days apparently) are a time where we don't have sex. Many people also try not to be able to touch, pass things, etc. It is an incredibly hard concept to wrap your head around and also do. We honestly do have a hard time being able to not touch, cuddle, pass things. We know people who don't have any issues with separating completely. Regardless of what you do/do not do you need to be able to reflect on the significance of the 12 days that you have a physical break with your spouse.

It's a time to be able to recharge, to look at one another as something other than a sex toy that can be bought at a local store, to figure out ways of communication without heavy breathing and muffling your mouth because you just want to scream ;-). So we are going to have, for the next 12 days, another idea for a couple to do.

Idea #1: Love Notes

You don't need to be a great writer to be able to do this. One can be able to touch the heart with words when you cannot directly touch your spouse. Expressing the love that the two of you share, as well as the naughty thoughts you have for one another, can ensure that you keep the flame burning and increasing the passion you will have when you get to hear the magic words 'kasher'.

As ideas go it isn't a bold one or one that people don't think about - however people forget to do it or just think 'she/he knows how I feel'. Notes aren't about showing you care or about saying something your spouse already knows. Notes are about how you can express how you feel, how you express what you want, and making sure that in your mind you remind yourself that you still want your spouse as much as you wanted her/him the first time you got together.